Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Stay With US.......


I have had a hard time blogging lately.
I wish I could say it is because I am so busy I just have not had the time.....
But I do.
I thought I could hop on here and say that life is so good, I have more important things to do....
But I really don't 
I wish I could say that life has gotten in the way
but it really has not....

Life feels like it is standing still
we are in so many ways....
Waiting.....
Waiting for Summer to pass....
Waiting for the leaves to change again.....
Waiting for Winter to be here....
Waiting for forward momentum....
Waiting for another new year.

Because, if I am being honest, this year has been hard
and I am ready for it to be a memory.
Things did not work out according to our plan in STL.
We are back here, 
living off family, 
searching for jobs, 
picking up the pieces,
trying to smile and push through
and it is hard.

I have been through what feels like every negative emotion
anger
fear
resentment
bitterness
envy
wishing bad thoughts toward people I once respected
and I am not proud of that.

But I am growing
and I am finding peace 
though pieces of understanding
I have mourned the loss of "what might have been"
I am thankful for what we have
and I am praying for those I once felt fury.
I have found a peace.
But it is hard.

Out of nowhere I will get so angry
at certain things
certain people
nothing in particular
and I have to make a decision
right then and there
Am I going to let this consume me?
My answer is NO!

I won't do that
to my husband
to my kids
my family
I won't do that to myself
I won't do that with this life

I will pray.....
for peace
patience
my marriage
my baby boy and girl

I will ask for guidance
I will fall again, but always 
one less time than I get back up

And this family
this little blog full of  
stories
memories
snapshots
will continue

Perfecting the art of making 
everyday "nothing" into 
something extraordinary
in our home.

Monday, March 21, 2011

drinkin in life......

aprons

Life isn't always easy. Some things you choose, some things you don’t, but it stirs together, and you drink it. And if it doesn’t taste quite right, you set to work in your kitchen adding, subtracting, perfecting that recipe until it’s the best damn drink you’ve ever tasted. The perfect cocktail. And Dude, we know how to make a good martini.


Wednesday, March 16, 2011

friends

friends
















There are moments
at a glimpse
I see the end to
 them being siblings
and the beginning
of an 
amazing 
friendship


Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Show me a SMILE


We went to the Dentist on Tuesday. It was our first cleaning with both the kids. {gulp}
I know, I thought I had it together too? But we put this one off for way too long!!!!

No excuses.....
BUT
financially
it was just a little 
MUCH
to take on for a while there...


So, we finally did it!

Mommy went first, hoping to decrease any anxiety by letting them see that I wasn't crying.

I decided B would go next, just in case we had some trouble, 
and the boy was a champ leading up to getting in the chair
we had discussed the visit for a few days leading up, 
and he walked tall as we entered, 
was even excited to put on the cool shades to protect him from
"Mr. Sunshine"
and then
the chair went back.....
all bets were off
the boy freaked out!!
And it was clear that he had lost it, and was not getting it back
at least not for a while...

So, on to PUNKY 
I told B we could take a break but that he would have to try again after E
he agreed....
and, of course
Guess who bounced into the seat with smiles abound
mouth wide open
shades on
and willing to hold "Mr. Thirsty" with no hesitation
THAT'S OUR GIRL!

B was more willing the second time around
especially with cookie dough toothpaste
{seriously? my back teeth are sweating...}

Whatever it takes!
HE did it, and licked his lips frantically after every tooth was "tickled" and "counted"
I guess it tasted good?

What a sight to see though
both my brave little souls
growing up
facing a fear
and conquering it
I am one proud momma!


Monday, March 7, 2011

CANT Break the RULES


I LOVE this little boy so much!
He is such a RULE FOLLOWER that
when he tries to tell the
"interrupting cow" joke
he simply can't interrupt me!
I have not laughed so hard in MONTHS!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

A few more favs from the "ball"

kiss


A sweet kiss from Dad-o to daughter.....


cousins


Precious cousins, holding hands........


my favorite three


My favorite three..............